Sunday, February 17, 2013

To Remember

{a little more about why I started a blog. reason #3: to remember}

“I have three children & the oldest is three.”

From the day my third child was born until about 7 1/2 months later when my oldest turned 4 that was my answer to the question “How many children do you have?”  
It was about that time when I started hearing “Are they all yours?”

It was also about that time when parenting became exponentially difficult. 
We were outnumbered. 
We were buying insane amounts of diapers. 
Just getting to the car felt like trying to solve a riddle- who should I carry first? Should I leave one unattended in the car or in the house? Should I load the stroller up just to get to the car? 
I had a double stroller that all 3 could ride on.

In my quest to find practical tricks & tips on how to solve dilemmas like how to get from the house to the van (oh yes, the minivan) I sought out those whose children’s ages mirrored our children’s ages, parents who had obviously been there & survived the 3, 3 & under club.  

On one particularly desperate-feeling day I asked “How did you survive?”
The desperation started to feel like panic when the answer was a somewhat glazed over look and something about how you “just do it”.

I understand now. Once you make it through the early years it’s pretty much a blur of a memory.

So how do you survive the early years?  

When it comes to the day-to-day, you can’t expect mothers & mothers-in-law to move in with you-at least I guess that’s not a reasonable expectation;-) 
Eventually everyone goes home. Your husband must go off to work. 
And there you are with the day stretching out before you full of meals & feedings, diapers &/or potty training, laundry, housework-if that’s possible? Somewhere in there you want to love on those babies. Oh, and unfortunately you'll need to go to the bathroom occasionally & a shower would be nice too. To add to it, you have the postpartum “fun” to deal with and possibly other physical difficulties factor in. I didn’t know it at that time, but my thyroid wasn’t healthy and that combined with the everyday demands had me feeling beyond exhausted.

Right now I’m in the 5 club. I’m in the 3 bigs (ages 9,7,5) & 2 littles club (2, 9 months). The 2, 2 & under club, plus 3. And we homeschool. This might seem like the worst time in my life to start a blog. It does to me- until I remember that I need[ed] help, practical wisdom for daily survival. 

Someday, I want a young mother to ask me how I survived & I want to have some answers ready for her. But to do that I need to remember what it actually is like while I’m "in the thick of it."

If I don’t write {blog} now, I may not remember enough to be able to help effectively. Mentorship & Discipleship are some developing passions of mine, something I desire to do more and more as my life goes on. I hope that what I write now while I am learning will better equip me to one day be the one called to teach.  I hope it helps my daughters one day. Maybe it will help & encourage even now. I hope & pray it does.

And to you who are right now in the 3, 3 & under club or some combination of it, 
I’m so sorry to say this, but in a way we do have to “just do it”.
But there are tools to help us do it. And we don’t have to do it alone.

“Older women likewise…teaching what is good, so that they may encourage the young women…” 
Titus 2:3-4

The 3, 3 & under club in 2007

“My soul still remembers…Through the LORD’S mercies we are not consumed, 
Because His compassions fail not, They are new every morning; 
Great is Your faithfulness” 
Lamentations 3:20-23

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